Sometimes, not always, I yearn to tell the truth. I want to walk into the classroom some days and announce: I feel your pain, or numbness, or defeat, or indifference, but that doesn’t stop me from pretending that what we do here in this sacred space called a classroom, three hours each week, can change lives. But I chicken out each time.
At other times, I just want to waltz in and say: Look at me. You see this fat? It didn’t just appear over night. It took a lifetime to get into this shape and it will take a lifetime to get out of it. Now, in this moment, is the span of our entire lifetime. A next moment, let alone tomorrow, is not guaranteed. There’s no point waiting. As The Drummer said in the film of the same name, “Life is full of thousands of moments and I am one of them. I am that moment. That moment is me.” Imagine. We know we are this moment and yet, we allow the opportunity to “make” us instead of taking the dominion that is already ours and using it for the greater good. Nothing like informed self-interest, is there?
Anyway, I think up all these things to inspire my students and instead, on certain occasions, I inspire myself yet remain scarcely to make the changes I desire. It’s slow going this moment by moment stuff. But, as Harvey Jackins was fond of saying, Fortunately or unfortunately, I happen to be the best person available for the job. Oh, you’re wondering perhaps, what’s the job? Leading your life, of course. Who better to do it?